Living through expectations

I think it’s hard growing up as a teen in this day and age, and I think if you disagree then you’re wrong. I’m not saying it’s the most tough thing in the world, I know that there are people much worse off, but it’s still hard. And there is one reason why, right there. Comparisons. Comparisons tear people down. Teens nowadays compare themselves so much to others and it is not healthy. I’ve done it myself. “I wish I looked like her”, “her body’s amazing, mine’s not”, if you say you haven’t done it you’re either lying or just very lucky, to be quite honest.

I think social media has a huge part to play in this, especially Instagram. Instagram is a very very very easy way of portraying a life that is not true. That girl you follow might have just got a brand new car, and is showing it off to the world, but that doesn’t actually mean she’s any better off than you. She might be paying a fortune a month to finance it, and has barely any money left after paying it to fund her for the rest of the month. But you don’t see that. You see a lavish lifestyle, and that’s because that’s what they want you to see.

I genuinely believe that if you want to see someone for as close to their true self as possible, through social media that is, look at their Twitter favourites. They might tweet what they want you to see, but often people favourite things because they think nobody else will see it, and that is more true to themselves than what they choose to write or retweet.

Comparisons are cruel. They’re there all the time to remind you that you’re not her, or that he’s better than you, but in reality, they might not be any better off than you. It’s a fake lifestyle portrayed through a screen and some wifi, but that’s not a bad thing, because that is what they want to show. The comparisons that we make are the bad part. But, that isn’t our fault. Society nowadays has all of these different expectations. Girls should be this size with this colour hair and career. Boys should hit the gym and drink protein shakes until they don’t consume anything other than chicken and Whey protein powder.

I see this quote floating around Instagram and twitter a lot:

And I just dislike it. A lot. It’s not easy to just quit your job. What if you can’t find another? What if you can’t afford to quit your job? It’s not that easy to move. Some people can’t just up and leave. It’s just not that simple. Nothing in the 21st century is that simple, and you’re a fool to believe that it is. Things are much more expensive, house prices are going up, jobs are getting less and less.

I think people now believe that you have to have what she has and you have to have the best car because he got the best car. And it’s just not that way. Or at least it shouldn’t be. Why do we compare ourselves all the time? It’s become a part of every day life for many people recently.

I was binge watching Britains Next Top Model earlier because I haven’t had the time to watch it recently, and there’s this one girl on there, Olivia, who is absolutely striking. She has the most amazing bone structure to her face, and she did a campaign with no make up on and I just couldn’t see anything wrong with her face. At all. I honestly think she’s flawless. I thought to myself – wow, I wouldn’t mind looking like her. But then again, she may not like the way she looks. She may pick apart at herself the things she dislikes. Now, I’m not saying that this is the case, however, my point is this: just because we want to look like someone else, someone else might want to look like us. We should embrace the way we look, because, let’s be honest, unless you have a stack of cash buried under your bed somewhere for surgery, you’re going to look the same forever. Sure, you can enhance things such as your lips, or boobs, but realistically, you’ll still look the same overall.

I used to hate having ginger hair. Two boys in primary school picked on me because of it, and it made me hate it. It is also so so so curly it’s unbelievable and I hated it, but now? I love it. I love it because it’s different and nobody I know has hair like it. I’ve embraced it, and I feel much better for it.

One more thing I want to mention, is what I touched on earlier. Cosmetic surgery. If a girl wants to get her lips done, bloody let her. It’s her face, and if she wants to do that then that’s her decision. If someone wants to go from size A boobs to size G, does that effect you? No, I thought not. So why does everyone suddenly judge when it comes to surgery. To be honest, if it makes you feel more beautiful, then I’m all for it.

What I’m trying to say is, comparisons are evil, and you’re never going to be another person. So why grow up hating the way you look? Why don’t you love yourself for who you are. Every single person is beautiful in a different way, and the sooner we love ourselves for who we are, what we can afford, what we own, where we live, the car we drive; the better.

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